Eleanor with the Weeping Eye

Post date: Mar 11, 2019 2:19:20 PM

As March digs its boots in, I feel the pull to dig back into a writing project. My first project was a YA (Young Adult Fiction) novel. Four people have read it completely on Swoon Reads and offered up much-appreciated encouragement and the focused and actionable feedback I was hoping for. Receiving detailed feedback was my main reason for making it available for people to read on the Swoon Reads platform. If you didn't get to read it yet, please take a look and tell me what you think about LUCY BOUND IN LYRICS. FYI: Kavanagh (with a "k" and no "u":) is my maiden name.

Here are a few comments from readers who finished the book on Swoon Reads:

Kris wrote, "I’m happy your poetic writing style continued throughout the piece. I also think you’ve captured something very raw and real with Lucy and it was a pleasure to experience her journey of self-exploration! This if one of the most unique coming-of-age stories I’ve read, and Lucy is refreshingly complex."

Cheryl wrote, "I liked so many things about this and hope you keep refining it and move it to publication! I really really loved Lucy!! What a great teen character. She’s strong, she’s smart, she’s literate. I liked the supporting characters, although Lori took some time to grow on me. Not sure if it was intentional or not, but at first I really disliked her. Their initial interaction in the ice cream shop felt a little choppy, and their make up conversation in the parking lot felt too quick of a resolution. But, after that scene, I enjoyed Lori and liked their friendship. I think the family dynamic is great. It has depth, realistic conflict, and the beginnings of some resolution by the end of the book. I like that some relationships do not get resolved all contritely perfectly, but more realistically complicated. As I mentioned previously, some of the back and forth dialogue didn’t flow as naturally as the narrative sections did, especially in the begging of the book. Sometimes, old fashioned words and phrases were used by the teens in the book that I just don’t ever hear real teens saying. I love the time spent on Maya [Angelou] and her works. Wonderful addition to the story!"

Marcia wrote, "I thoroughly enjoyed reading Lucy Bound in Lyrics! There was a steady build of character development and I was totally invested in Lucy's coming-of-age. I wouldn't change a word of the scene where she has the opportunity to read her poem--well done. The timeline is accurate and consistent.

Similar Stories: This story felt quite unique to me, so I'm unable to think of any others it brought to mind."

Now I feel the pull to start (or continue on) with a new project. It will be MG (Middle Grade Fiction) since my kids are too young for YA, but old enough to be interested in reading what I'm writing--so, I'd love to write something they are able to read. I started this in November thanks to NaNoWriMo and, as you can see, I didn't get far. But, you have to start something before you can ever finish it and so I am giving you a taste of the very first (very short) first chapter of ELEANOR WITH THE WEEPING EYE in hopes that it will help remind me to continue on and write some more and more and more--until that too is finished.

Spring will prevail regardless of winter's last efforts to cast its chill. Here's to tree buds, flower sprouts, new life and completing projects!


The first time I saw Eleanor with the Weeping Eye, I thought she was just plain Eleanor. She sat, barely visible, to the side of the second floor window with a lace, rose-patterned sheer as her translucent shield from the outside world. Only the right side of her face breached the protective cover with its eye perfectly and yet impossibly violet and most definitely dry. In fact, I wouldn’t have seen even that much had the baseball not reached the height of that very window making her startle and sending a waft of air through that rose-patterned sheer. My eyes drawn to that trembling swath of fabric caught her, only for a flash, though, and she was gone while the lace hung limply once again. As I turned back to my friends yelling to me from the street, I already started to doubt what it was I had seen in that second-floor window. I had never known a girl to live there and certainly not one with violet eyes.

“Did you see that?! There was a girl up there with violet eyes—or at least one. One big violet eye!” I said in a fading, far-off voice that told them I was still looking at her in my imagination.

The violet detail was the part that made my friend Vance clench up one half of his face and swat at me with a, “Psst!” while Ian turned away with an, “Ok, sure!”

For a moment I doubted myself.

“It must have been the reflection of the ball in the window,” Owen said. Len insisted that I was taking them off the subject to distract from the fact that I should have been rounding bases and running home, but had instead stood staring uselessly at a window. I was tagged out before I even made it to first base. Ethan snarled his upper lip and nodded his head.

“Hey Violet—start concentrating on the game,” Tommy mocked.

I shook my head as if to wake myself up. Had I imagined the violet part? I checked the window once more but it was empty and seemed to stare back impatiently as if it was one big eye, urging me to “Get on with it! Go play the game and stop looking at me. Leave me be!”

And so, I went back to my team, now in the outfield, and tried to keep my eye on the ball.

. . . to be continued:)

P.S. If you see me--tell me to finish my MG project. Don't take "No" for an answer. Don't accept "I've been busy." for an excuse! Hold me accountable:)